I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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