Define "chronic" masturbator.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Randomize