you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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