I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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