I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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