I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Randomize
