I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Randomize