I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
