You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
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