a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I'm getting married
To pizza
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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