Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
