NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
