Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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