She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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