I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize