Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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