If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
she told me i tasted like america
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Randomize
