"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize