I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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