I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
if i died would you start the facebook group?
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize
