...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
