omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize