need another drink. this is the easiest way
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
