Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
i drank out of a bidet.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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