two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Randomize