I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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