i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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