R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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