Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Someone shattered a urinal.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
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