we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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