Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Randomize
