you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
