wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
