i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Randomize
