i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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