I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
