that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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