some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
