You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
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