I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I forgot wine drunk hurts
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize
