On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Randomize
