We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Randomize
