i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
