turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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