stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
