Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
