k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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