Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize