this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
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