He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
