i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
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