i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
